Another lil' update

Amelia and her new fave pastime- the 'side'





Just wanted to let you know another example of how God is providing. We went to our randomly assigned playgroup for the first time last week (we were assigned through the online moms group I joined). While there I got talking to another mom. It turns out that she grew up in Peoria and went to Peoria Christian and knew a bunch of people that I also grew up with. Then, she said that she grew up going to Morton Bible and knew a bunch of people that I knew growing up from there as well. Then, she said that her parents go to Crosspoint and we learned that she knows my brother-in-law and his parents. THEN, she said that her parents still live in Morton and, we determined, live 5 houses down from my parents on the SAME STREET. How cool is the Lord! Most importantly I have met another strong Christian mom in my area. Thank you Jesus!

Itty bitty update...

So, in case you are wondering... my 'mystery friend' did show up to Toddler Time at the library last week and we exchanged phone numbers. Over the weekend we touched base and set up a time to walk today (Tuesday). While on a walk we started talking about churches and it turns out she's a CHRISTIAN TOO!!! And she's my age and has a daughter Amelia's age and lives 2 blocks away AND her husband used to lead worship and is now a counselor at a hospital. Isn't God INCREDIBLE!!! Praising him today for his faithfulness!!!! Also, another mom at my Bible study asked me out for coffee. So super excited!

Call me Abram...

Change is very difficult for me. With anything new it takes me a bit to adjust. So, naturally I've had good days and bad. Somedays things go really well and I make a new friend and can see the prospects in my future. Other days I sink into a pit of self pity and depression, mourning all that I've 'left behind'. I still feel like I'm entering the gates of heaven when I drive down Veterans Parkway, and feel sick to my stomach every time we pack up the car to leave Bloomington. I find myself asking, "Why God? My life would be perfect if only I didn't have to leave".

Several weeks ago I was asked to write a devotional for our church to be used during a missions conference in the fall. My randomly assigned verse is Genesis 12:1-3. (this gives me chills...)
The LORD had said to Abram, "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you. I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse; and all peoples on earth will be blessed through you."
Has God ever called you somewhere or asked you to do something that you really didn’t think you wanted to do? Have you ever been in a situation where all the doors (and windows) were opening and you were sure that God was showing you His plan, but you thought, “ Really, God? Are you kidding me?” I keep telling him, “I’m so happy here. I have everything I have ever wanted. Life is perfect. You really want me to leave all this?” And he keeps answering, “Yes”. Thankfully, I have his promise and assurance to rest on. I know that his plans for me are far greater than my plans for me, and my life will be blessed beyond belief by following his will. I know that, even though I am leaving behind so much of what I hold dear and view as ‘perfect’, he has a life even greater in store for me. That in itself is so hard to comprehend. That what he has planned for my future is even better than what I think is incredible now. So, no matter where you feel God is leading you, or how much you want or don’t want to go, you can trust his perfect plan and his wisdom. By following the Lord’s will, your life will be blessed and he will use you to bless other’s lives in a way that is greater than you ever could have imagined. It is absolutely terrifying to walk out in faith, but we will be richly blessed by doing so.
Jer. 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Am I on Spring Break?

I truly am loving being a stay at home mom. I wake up every morning thinking, "REALLY? Is this REALLY my life? How awesome!" and every Sunday night I'm shocked that I don't have to go to work the next day. Thankfully many of my "Fears of Exclusive Motherhood" (ie. not having a purpose, missing feeling accomplished, etc) I haven't really experienced. Surprisingly, I'm struggling in the opposite direction. I always envision myself as an uber-organized SAHM who had the house spic-n-span, laundry done, dinner made, coupons clipped, and toys alphabetized. Instead, I'm finding that, honestly, I could care less. I think that there are several things that are contributing to this:

1) I am a procrastinator at heart. I know that I work much better with deadlines and expectations (both of which now I have very few).
2) I have been so super scheduled/ motivated/organized for the past 2 years (because I had no choice) that I think I might just need a break. I used to be on the go from 5am until 11pm balancing work life AND home life, and I'm ready for a change of pace.
3)Housework has never been a priority for me. Laundry and cleaning have always been at the bottom of my to do list beneath "family quality time", and were the things I squeezed in on the weekends. So, it's been difficult to envision them being my agenda for the day.
4) Subconsciously I might be avoiding the "housewife" stigma I have in my mind.


So, right now the item on the top of my prayer list has been my Motivation. I am intentionally scheduling something every single day to ensure that we are up and around (or the Lord knows I might never shower :-) And I'm trying to live by my To Do list (although they keep getting misplaced;-). And I daily set my alarm to get up before Amelia does (although so far I have turned it off every time...) AND, the Lord has blessed me with a VERY active little girl who doesn't sit still for 2 minutes and won't let me sit still either :-)

I have also done some deep soul searching and come to realize that this is how I can serve my husband and daughter. It's not just picking up and cleaning up so that my house isn't trashed- it's how I can love them. At my Bible study this morning the question was posed "How do you use your life to glorify God?" When I was working as a social worker this was easy. I literally spent most of my waking moments helping people and was blessed to be able to have an occupation where I served people every day. Now that I spend my days changing diapers and cleaning toilets, that question is a little harder to answer. I think that it comes down to living with intention. Remembering that EVERY SINGLE THING I do needs to be done in such a way that I glorify the Lord. I always think about that verse in 1 Cor 9:24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. To me that translates to, "Do your best because this is what God is calling you to do." I know that, in this season of my life, God is calling me to serve my family and I know He will help me to find joy in that! Instead of viewing housework as my 'job' and 'agenda', I am trying to see it as a God's role for me right now, and my way that I am able to glorify Him!!
Therefore, I am learning how to balance my day, how to prioritize, and praying for the will power to want to be productive.
Ephesians 2:10.For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Finding Joy on the Journey

So I am approaching the 3 week mark of being a "Transplanted Stay at Home Mommy" and things are going relatively well. Every day is a new adjustment and adventure and I am trying to soak up the joy in all of it. The day after my last post (the Lord's Ikea intervention :-) Amelia and I stumbled into a toddler time at our local library. It was 30 minutes of songs, books, games, and crafts- but best of all other mommies! I met another mom who has a daughter Amelia's age and lives just one block away and wanted to exchange phone numbers and get together. I was THRILLED! I came home and called Jason right away exclaiming," I made a FRIEND!" He said, "Great! What's her name?" Uhhhhh, kinda forgot about that part. So, there is another toddler time today and I'm praying my 'mystery friend' shows up. In the meantime, my goal has been to get involved as much as I can. I joined a MOPS group in the next town and, although the actually meeting itself is full due to childcare, they invited me to a playgroup this week. It was like a breath of fresh air! A group of young moms with young kids who were Christians. I had the best 90 minutes I'd had in a long
time. I am so thankful that these ladies were brought across my path and look forward to getting to know them in the future. AND, I got another phone number (do I sound like a Jr. High boy or what?) More than anything I am praising the Lord for the courage he's given me. I'm absolutely amazed at how easy it has been for me to, almost daily, go to an address of a playgroup and walk in like I actually know the people inside. Maybe all of my years of social work have been training me for this very thing. So, the journey continues! Can't wait to see where we end up next!

Bloom where you are planted...

So last weekend (thanks to both of our parents for watching Amelia!) we packed up 50% of our 'stuff' and did a partial move to McHenry, IL where Jason has been living since August. We're still not quite sure what we are doing with our Bloomington house (renting vs. selling)so our furniture, etc. is going to stay put for a little while.
As I've written about before, throughout this process I've been mostly concerned with developing a support system and friends in this northern foreign land. I think it's so hard for women to make friends sometimes. It's almost like dating... You see someone you think you might get along well with, maybe exchange emails or do a 'group activity', and possibly become Facebook friends :-). After several group get togethers you might get up the nerve to exchange phone numbers and do coffee (a one-on-one!). Finally you take the plunge and have them over for dinner... and friendship is achieved!
So, I did what any good problem solver does and conducted research! I found a McHenry Moms Group (MMG) online that has gobs of activities and lots of members. Perfect, I thought! I signed up, got my welcome email and was good to go. Monday (Day 1) was the first event that I signed up for at an indoor playground. There was only one other mom there, and she was 37 weeks preggo so her hubby was with her. She was nice enough, but it wasn't the mom-bonding experience I had hoped for. Tuesday (Day 2) I woke up to a MMG email announcing a Bible Study that was at 9am that morning! A sign from God indeed! I threw Amelia into some relatively clean clothes (since we are living out of boxes) and dug out my Bible (since we are living out of boxes :-). As I pulled into the church I was thrilled that I was on the right track and had visions of Christian moms supporting one another dancing in my head. As I walked in, my eyes honestly filled with tears when I saw there were mostly 70+ year olds around the table, and a sprinkling of moms of grade school kids. Lord, where were the young moms I had prayed for? They were so nice and welcoming and I know God put me there for a reason, but I did leave that group feeling a little let down. The moms there also said that the MMG I had excitedly joined didn't have many Christian members, and religion was a 'taboo' topic. Great. I knew that this process would be hard, but I didn't know it would be so painful. My MOMS group at home has always been such an incredible blessing to me, so I'm looking for those close friendships here. Now, I know I'm being a little irrational expecting a strong friendship within my first 2 days... but God does work miracles, right?

The day before we moved, Jason bought me a necklace with a large stone on it to remind us that the Lord is our rock and will get us through this time. As I was driving home disappointed, I looked at that necklace and really thought, "What does that mean... He is my rock. What does that look like?" I am a very literal person and was really struggling with what God will 'do' to be a rock for me. And then I remembered my earlier struggle back in January when I didn't really know what it meant to have faith... and God showed me that in a BIG way. And so I have been praying for God to teach me to rely on Him and show me what it means to be our rock.

On day 3 God began to give me a glimpse when I got an early morning phone call from incredible friends and they generously invited me to join them for shopping at Ikea. The Lord provided for my need in a way that I had not even expected. He knows my heart and He is caring for me.

So, to make a long story short, I am absolutely LOVING being a stay at home mommy. I am soaking up every moment with Amelia, knowing how many I have already missed out on. Like I have told some of you, I feel like I have to learn to be a parent all over again. I was only a parent between the hours of 5-7pm and shared a weekend shift. There are all kinds of things I'm catching up on. But our time together has been incredible and I'm SO THANKFUL that I am blessed to be able to be with her everyday. It truly is a treasure and a privilege! I will go back to that Bible Study next Tuesday. I figure, they definitely have some wisdom that I may need to borrow... and studying the Bible can't hurt either :-) You never know why God puts you in the places that you are. As for getting involved, I'm just going to continue to pray for doors to be opened and the right friends to cross my path. Like a good friend told me, "Ya just gotta keep trying and bloom where you're planted..."

P.S. Totally wish I could get the Michael W. Smith song "Friends are Friends Forever" outta my head!!!

Playing Beauty Shop... I LOVE it that this is my new agenda!!